I hadn’t heard about Pema Chödrön until my friend Rani mentioned her in a comment she made to this post – The Road to Loving Ourselves. Thanks Rani !
Pema Chödrön is an amazing woman. She was born Deirdre Blomfield-Brown in 1936, in New York City, and after two devastating divorces she turned towards a life as a Buddhist nun in 1974. She received the full monastic ordination in the Chinese lineage of Buddhism in 1981 in Hong Kong. Pema Chödrön is also a prolific author.
Then just a few days ago I saw that Pema Chödrön was being interviewed by Oprah Winfrey and I thought it was just a great chance for my first exposure to her. I wasn’t disappointed. She’s an amazing woman.
Here is the interview. Below it you will find my notes.
I’m sorry to say that it looks like Oprah has taken this video down. Lucky I’ve already watched it and my my own notes from it. A couple of people have posted excerpts on YouTube (I’ve included two examples at the very bottom of this page), and Oprah has posted a full transcript here.
Pema Chödrön Interview – My Notes
- says her second husband was a great teacher “because he left me”
- “didn’t know how much I needed someone else to affirm me”
- her husband walking out eventually taught her that she didn’t need someone else to confirm her – that can come from within
- “know how to fail very well”
- welcome the pain
- “the rawness of vulnerability”
- Buddha only taught two things – suffering and end of suffering
- Compassionate Abiding
- locate suffering (discontent) in the body
- feel it
- breathe it in (the unwanted)
- into your heart and it gets bigger
- breathe out a lot of space
- “Human beings don’t just feel good, have you noticed that?”
- Everyone is trying to feel good all the time and they sometimes do bad things to achieve it
- “Fear is a natural reaction to moving closer to the truth”
- fear comes from not knowing what is going to happen
- “If you don’t know the nature of fear, you can never be fearless”
- Anxiety, jealousy, rage, loneliness are all forms of fear
- Pema thinks (but is ready to be surprised) that death will be like entering a dream
- Shenpa – the feeling of being hooked
- remove yourself from the situation
- give yourself some space (really, like finding an open space outside)
- notice your thoughts (meditate)
- then come back to being present
- noticing something real in the present
- being aware of our thoughts changes us
- nothing wrong has happened, life is pointing you in another direction
- ego tries to stop us from going to uncomfortable places but we can learn to experience those things and evolve
- somehow there’s always a “forward”
- religion could be like holding onto beliefs whereas spirituality could be beyond beliefs
- change is just the way things are
- “We already have everything we need – there’s no need for improvement”
- “We are a blink of an eye from being fully awake”
- One of he books is called “Start Where You Are”
Related Links – Pema Chödrön
- About Pema Chödrön – http://pemachodronfoundation.org/about/pema-chodron/
- Oprah’s full transcript of the interview – http://www.oprah.com/spirit/Oprah-Winfrey-Talks-to-Pema-Chodron
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